


Herd

by altered_eagle



Series: City Goblins [6]
Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Alfred angst, Bruce Wayne is a Mother Hen, Caretaking, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Joker whump, Ketamine, M/M, Semi-graphic descriptions of illness, The Babysitter's Club - Freeform, here we go again, the doctors at Arkham fucked up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-30
Updated: 2017-10-30
Packaged: 2019-01-26 14:44:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12559728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/altered_eagle/pseuds/altered_eagle
Summary: You knew when your pager rang that it could be for any number of terrible reasons,but you weren’t exactly prepared for what you find when you open Bruce’s bedroom door: the master himself sitting on his bed with his arms full of clown, IV lines snaking in between the two of them as Bruce holds the Joker steady.





	Herd

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place when Alfred is still pissed about batjokes, and pissed whenever Bruce brings the clown man around. The title comes from the song Herd by O'Death, which was also inspired [this fic.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8015542/chapters/18349825)
> 
> There's a warning here for semi-graphic descriptions of illness, so if you're emetophobic you might not want to read this fic...or like...half of my other fics for that matter. i am gross

[Herd: O'Death](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xxd3IadfnsQ)

 

You knew when your pager rang that it could be for any number of terrible reasons,

but you weren’t exactly prepared for what you find when you open Bruce’s bedroom door: the master himself sitting on his bed with his arms full of clown, IV lines snaking in between the two of them as Bruce holds the Joker steady. There’s a bucket on the floor along with a few towels and pieces of Batman’s armor.

The room smells like sweat and vomit, and the Joker himself is splattered in it. He’s shivering and retching into a towel, clinging to Bruce’s arms hard enough to bruise. His hair is matted and his face free of paint and he seems drugged. His scars stand out stark against his white face.

 _Can you please give him a push of zofran?_ Bruce asks, staring up at you with a frantic look in his eyes. _i can’t let go of him or he’ll_...Bruce shrugs helplessly, and the Joker burrows deeper into him. You move quickly to the side of the bed pick up the syringe and inject it into the port on the hanging IV bag. You reach up to squeeze the bag as the Joker shudders and twitches on the mattress, muttering something about insects in between dry heaves.

 _Thank you_ , Bruce breathes as the Joker’s gagging tapers off. The clown glances up with wide dark eyes but he’s looking straight through you, which is probably for the better. Without the face paint he looks very young, you realize.

 _Li_ _e down_ , Bruce tells him. _i’ll be right back._

 _Don’t._ The clown grabs at Bruce’s hand but Bruce reaches out to stroke his hair.

 _i’m not leaving you_ , he whispers and the look in his eyes is terrifying. It’s as if the Joker is all he can see. _Lie down and rest Shugs, we’re just going across the room to talk. You’ll be able to see me._

 _What if...what if it’s not you_. The Joker’s voice is flat. Bruce’s mouth twitches, and he takes the Joker’s face in his hands.

 _Don’t worry_ , he says and his voice is so gentle it chills you to your core. He moves the other man to lie on his side, although he stays propped up on his elbows, shivering and muttering to himself. Then Bruce motions for you to stand by the bathroom door, and for a few moments the only sound in the room is the sound of a hand moving on fabric as Bruce rubs the clown’s back.

He calms.

He lies down.

You’ve seen Bruce tame monsters before, but never like this.  

 

  
Finally Bruce stands up picks up the bucket and walks across the floor, past you and into the bathroom. The toilet flushes, and water runs, and Bruce emerges a moment later, looking pale and exhausted. He looks over your shoulder but the Joker is lying completely still, staring at Bruce in a way that’s more than a bit off-putting.

 _Look,_ Bruce says to you at last, _i can clean him up by myself. Can you bring me some washcloths and water? And maybe some lysol or something, he threw up on the floor..._ Bruce’s eyes wander back to the man in his bed.

 _Of course, Sir,_ you manage _. Will you require my assistance any further?_ Bruce seems a thousand miles away.

_What? Oh no, no. He’s just overmedicated, and out of it. i took blood and urine and he’ll just have to sleep it off._

_So he’s not injured, then?_ You ask. Bruce avoids your eyes.

_Not this time._

You feel your eyebrows rise.

 _It's more than that okay_ , Bruce snaps. _He’s on ketamine—those idiots at Arkham doped him up with enough fucking horse tranquilizer to take down three men his size. He’s been throwing up and hallucinating for almost an hour, and we’re both very tired. I’m going to clean him up and put him to bed, and then i’m going to bed, and i’m cancelling all of my meetings today. Probably tomorrow too. If you could just. Give him his medication at six and call down to the restaurant, have them make him something to eat. Something that’ll be easy on his system. That’s all i’ll ask of you._

_Sir—_

_Alfred_ **_please_** _. i’m asking you as a friend._ Bruce looks away from you, clears his throat. _He. He’s so sick, Alfred. When i brought him here his blood pressure was one fifty over ninety, he can’t walk, and he still can’t take any fluids. He’s suffering, and we have the tools to stop it._

This isn’t about numbing suffering, you want to say to him. Bringing this man into your home isn’t just about numbing suffering, putting this madman to sleep in your bed and climbing in after him, holding him and whispering endearments into his temple isn’t numbing suffering. It’s love.

Then Bruce’s eyes suddenly fill with tears, and you know it’s over. It’s done.

There is nothing you can say or do to change his mind.

**Author's Note:**

> **Squeezing an IV bag helps push the medicine faster. Yep


End file.
